“He is a drunkard don’t associate with him”
” He is a druggie – beware he can rob and kill you”
“Don’t pay attention to him … he is a useless piece of shit .. smoking pot all day like a chimney”
Society degrades, demeans and disgraces the person suffering from the disease of addiction.
The individual born with the addictive personality has the following traits
- he/ she is very intelligent has a good grasping power .
- Is very sensitive, loving, more caring than others in the family or society. At the same time, they find it very difficult to deal with their emotional states which tend to the extreme .
- They expect others to do as much for them as they do for the others. Expectations always fall short .
- They are very passionate in whatever they love to do .. they will dive into the activity with totality, zealously and excel in it
- They are socially manipulative to get their way .
- In the constructive direction they win kudos in academics or any profession they lay their hands on.
- They are more productive than any other person in the group in a shorter span of time.
Emotionally, however, if they are not balanced they can be very restless, moody, over-sensitive, they are unable to say no and are generous to a fault of themselves and of what they have. At the same time, they expect that those they care for should do the same for them, and others always fall short of this expectation which then fills them with resentment, hurt and pain.They have false beliefs of self
- That they are not loved enough
- They are not good enough
- They have been abandoned
- Many of them genuinely exposed to emotional and physical and sexual abuse get more damaged emotionally and enter into relationships that are needy, are unhealthy and dysfunctional.
- This becomes an impediment in their progress in life.
- Their own minds and belief systems and perceptions of life become obstacles to their progress.
- If substances come along their way that gives a false sense of feeling good about themselves and their circumstances. They get stuck in an emotional age. Their persona changes due to the substance use and the addiction to them making them identify themselves as somebody they are not.
- where they continue to make wrong decisions .
- continue to trust the wrong people as their judgement and reasoning is skewed due to the intoxicants,
- they are generous to the wrong people .
- they are cheated by business partners, fair-weather friends, sycophants .
- The environment of treatment to be for the person suffering from addiction should be non- judgemental, accepting and compassionate with experiential counsellors who have walked the path to share and guide them.
- To identify and recognize this innocence in oneself, become aware of all aspects and denials of it. This is essential so that awareness of one’s vulnerabilities is at optimum.
- Tools are provided for them to prevent relapses by dealing with past perceived emotional pain in totality- through sharing, counseling, writing, and various meditation/awareness techniques. A detachment of emotions from past incidents is achieved by this. Identification of one’s patterns of perception, denials, beliefs, and emotions are understood. A sense of being responsible for all that has happened in their lives and the consequences of using are realised and accepted.
- Living a full life away from using, living realistically, by being more aware and understanding of oneself generates self- love, self -compassion and an awareness of those around.