Fear of Missing Out

A Day At Anatta – The Anatta Module – A Counsellor And Client’s Narrative And Experience
May 30, 2020

Fear of Missing Out

The Fear of missing out or being left out is very prominent in the youth of today . The constant checking of that last check-in time on Whatsapp, the likes on Instagram or Twitter getting them to always live in the next moment thereby actually missing out on life today.

It was also present in the earlier generations. However, in the current age of instant gratification, if we want something we can order it online, we do not wait for the mail but send an e-mail. For the youth the world has become virtual. Virtual friendships, relationships, games jobs, etc.

Pub culture, pub hopping, parties, using substances, pill popping i.e. using a pill for everything, from feeling uncomfortable about a situation, a failure in an exam, a pill to stay awake, a pill to sleep , a pill to remember and a pill to forget .

Time to process pleasant or unpleasant emotions and deal with them is not taken. The value of working one’s way towards something, not receiving life on a platter and earning our achievements is a lesson our youth learns the hard way.

Individuals who suffer from addiction to substances go in for a residential treatment for the same. The fears that keep them from seeking help for a long time is that they will lose out on the friendships that they had when using. The ones with substance use and who drink alcohol think that they can drink even if they do not use. The premise being, they can party and drink but not use drugs and thereby not isolate themselves socially.

In treatment, they do realize that any intoxicant has to be discontinued as it would eventually take addictive proportions and/take them back to their substance of choice , as, it is the individual that is to be treated ,not the substance.

This brings them back to the previous fear of missing out on parties and gatherings and thereby losing out on friends, hence ending up lonely and alone. As most young adults drink or use, finding sober friends becomes a challenge in current times.

During their residential stay , in a programme that is accepting, holistic ,with Counselling , writing , meditation as foundations of therapy, they learn to accept themselves, take responsibility of their lives and be comfortable in their own skin , enjoying their own company.

They learn in treatment-

  • To be patient with themselves
  • To always keep one’s sobriety as the priority in one’s life
  • They work through past emotional issues and develop the skills to deal with new one’s that life will spring up. This makes them self-reliant.
  • To chart their progress and goals and achievements as per their pace and goals
  • To not compare themselves with others
  • To value themselves and their successes
  • To recognize that using friends are not true friends from their own experiences
  • To seek and develop new acquaintances into friendships or nurture prior neglected sober friendships.
  • To develop new hobbies and modes of socializing like going to the gym , sober trekking, sober parties ,etc.
  • To incorporate mindfulness , awareness and meditation as a way of life

To finally realize that it is not "Missing out" but creating a new paradigm shift to a more realistic, fun and fulfilling life.

Anatta offers such a non- judgmental, compassionate ambience in luxurious natural environs with experiential counsellors who , having been there and done that, live productive , prosperous, joyful lives in recovery being “in” with Life at all times.

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